Down to the wire: Decision Time

It is nearing the end of April. A painful deadline is zooming closer to us daily. You will have to excuse me for not writing for a few weeks, but both Blake and I have been going through some major life decisions. No, don't hold your breath, we have nothing amazing or new to share with you, since, as a Libra and Scorpio-on-the-cusp of Libra we have literally no chance of ever making a decision about anything.

Our lack of decision-making ability became glaringly apparent when we were wedding planning. If not for the input of my mother, sister and bridesmaids, I am not sure there would have been a wedding! I am so lousy at figuring out what I want that I often simmer in a state of denial and wait until the last minute possible at which point I am forced to make a split second choice. To my defence, the few times that I am able to make up my mind, I am very well informed and support fully the choice I make. You see, I got as a gift a large Pros and Cons chart that has been my lifesaver. I can often be found curled up on the sofa with my lists in hand. Each decision carefully outlined into two neat categories. With the aid of this chart I am able to make a few more decisions, but sometimes I still find myself yo-yoing back and forth after the list clearly indicates one path. Anyways, I digress. Some of you may not know this, but when Blake was offered a promotion last fall he was also offered an open-ended contract. This now meant that we no longer had to leave the island in June, which was supposed to be the end of our Cayman Islands Adventure. With this new option in mind, we were fully leaning towards staying on in Grand Cayman. I mean, who wouldn't want to live in paradise? He also found out the he will be able to be a manager in his group this fall. However, I am only on a leave of absence from my job back in Canada. My school division graciously provided me with a two year leave, but this September they expect me back. No exceptions. Still, we knew that Paradise doesn't come knocking on everyone's doors, and we are lucky to be here, why not extend the lifestyle for a few more years? Of course, right when we think we have made a decision we are smacked in the face with more reality. I began hearing how difficult it was in Alberta to find a teaching job. Many lay-offs were happening in my district and it was very difficult even to find a substitute position. Being uncertain as to whether or not I would be offered a position here in the fall, returning home looked like the best option. Blake began to look into it as well, and may be able to be a manager back in Edmonton too. Right when we were beginning to settle with that option I was interviewed and basically told that I will have a position here in Cayman this September at a private school. Switch of our plans again!

Each time we feel we have made progress we find out more facts. Rather than bore you with all of the minute details, I will admit that we are still receiving information daily that makes us want to stay, or feel the need to leave. What I can say is this: either decision will leave us excited for new possibilities yet devastated about leaving something behind. Should we return home my heart will ache for this special island, for my amazing lifestyle, for the diving, for the friends I have made, for the 365 (almost!) days of sun a year, for the travel opportunities and cultural experiences, but I will be excited to feel like a valued staff member again, to be able to use my French daily, to buy a house and get a puppy and drive a car that doesn't break or need repair every 14 days. If we chose to stay I will be so upset about selling our cars, leaving behind my sister and family for a few more years, not being able to use all the amazing gifts we got for our wedding, not being able to inhale fresh clean crisp air, not being able to see my friends from home and most of all, losing my career for who knows how long. I would look forward to continued travel to Caribbean islands, meeting more new people, starting a job in a small private school with a great reputation, having more visitors come and see us, and of course, continuing to live the most amazing life ever!!!! So, as you can hopefully see, we are stuck in limbo! We know that family and friends have the best intentions on trying to help us decide, but we know that this is only a decision the two of us can make. Do we follow our hearts or heads? Stability or Live-for-the-moment freedom?

It is down the wire. Only a few more days before our decision must be made. Please feel free to weigh in on the biggest decision of our life! What would you do? Leave a comment, send us an email or lend us some words of wisdom, because at this point we are both stress cases and our nerves are nearly shot!!! HELP!!!!!!

Pictured above: Cayman or Canada?